Uncle Henry speaks from the heart on the YBR. A 2022 commencement address.

“Uncle Henry never laughed. He worked very hard from early morning till late night and did not know what joy was. He was gray too, from his long beard to his rough boots, and he looked stern and solemn, and rarely spoke.”
―The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (1900)

While it’s traditional to begin a commencement address with a joke or a humorous anecdote, I will not break character. Although it is hard to believe, I never laughed. I was stern and silent. I was gray in a gray world. Rather than regale you with bromides and empty promises, I want to talk to you from the heart in an intelligent way with the courage of my convictions.

I shed a bucketful of tears the other day when I learned of the shooting at Robb Elementary in Uvalde, Texas. That such a tragic event should cast a dark cloud over your special day is powerfully sad. However, sadness is like a cancer that spreads like wildfire.

As sad as the most recent mass shooting in a school is, what is sadder is if we forget before we do something about it.

You might be asking yourself what you possibly do about it. You have enough on your plate: college loans, Covid, inflation, and supply chain issues to name just a few of the potholes on your yellow brick road.

Did college prepare you for the “real world?” Are you ready to take your place as an active participant in the life that awaits you? I am here to tell you that if you spent the last four years of your life only focused on getting an entry-level job at the expense of becoming the person you could be, then you wasted four years of your life.

As a young child you learned how to read. But unless you read to learn, you have many miles to go because learning is the carrot on the end of the stick. Learning is the spur that urges us on. Learning did not only happen in your classes. In fact, I believe that not much real learning goes on in the classroom. Learning was hiding all over the campus. Learning masqueraded as an opportunity. And as an old man, I can tell you that opportunity is not a lengthy visitor.

That’s the message I want to give you today. Be aware of the opportunities that tap you on the shoulder and then choose wisely because you have a lot to consider when an opportunity comes your way.

If you did learn anything in college, I hope you learned how to think….critically; how to love…unconditionally; and how to have the courage to stand up to the forces of evil that will come your way.

Don’t allow yourself to become gray. Don’t believe there is nothing you can do, because every act of kindness you do will make a difference in the world. Don’t wait for tomorrow to live. Live now. Open yourself to new and meaningful friendships. Open your mind to new ideas. Have fun doing whatever you do. Find something to be enthusiastic about and find something to be indignant about. Then do something about both.

And lastly, appreciate the gift of life because it is a precious gift, a gift that was denied to the precious children and teachers at Robb Elementary. Since their names will never be called at a college commencement, I would like to end my talk to you today by calling out the names of those innocent children and the two wonderful teachers whose lives were cut short:

• Makenna Lee Elrod
• Layla Salazar
• Maranda Mathis
• Nevaeh Bravo
• Jose Manuel Flores Jr.
• Xavier Lopez
• Tess Marie Mata
• Rojelio Torres
• Eliahna “Ellie” Amyah Garcia
• Eliahna A. Torres
• Annabell Guadalupe Rodriguez
• Jackie Cazares
• Uziyah Garcia
• Jayce Carmelo Luevanos
• Maite Yuleana Rodriguez
• Jailah Nicole Silguero
• Amerie Jo Garza
• Alexandria “Lexi” Aniyah Rubio
• Alithia Ramirez
• Eva Mireles (teacher)
• Irma Garcia (teacher)
  
  

Go forth today believing that you are a unique crayon whose job it is to add your color to the world. And don’t forget to color outside the lines!

Don’t go gray!

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Getting to the top of the mountain on the YBR.

Dorothy never had to climb a mountain in Oz because, as far as I know, there were no mountains mentioned by L. Frank Baum. There was, instead, the long and winding Yellow Brick Road (YBR) that stretched from Munchkin Land to the Emerald City.

I had the privilege this morning of having a phone conversation with one of the best students I ever had the good fortune of having during my 17 year “tenure” at Marist College. (He was actually not one of the best, he was the best.)

During the course of our conversation I talked about how in life we climb a mountain.  Obviously it was an analogy, but I thrive on analogies. Hence, a blog about mountain climbing.

Rare is the person who doesn’t envision a mountain they want or need to climb.  It becomes a goal. The desire to reach the summit becomes a driving force in their life.  Making it to the top of the mountain often becomes an obsession.

I like mountains.  I think having a mountain in your life is a “thing.”  I don’t say a good or bad thing because there are so many factors involved in climbing the mountain that could eventually define us and be the pinnacle of our life story.

I hasten to add that the mountain must be your mountain.  We should never climb someone else’s mountain or else we risk wasting our life on the climb up. And if we are sure we are climbing our mountain, it would help if we knew what we hoped to accomplish be making the climb.

In one of his most famous speeches, Martin Luther King, Jr. told us he had been to the mountaintop and saw the promised land.  That’s something only a handful of people ever achieve. But, as we all know, MLK’s journey to the mountaintop was arduous.

I don’t know of any MLK mountain climbers, but that’s not because I am not surrounded by many good people, it’s just that most of us see fame, success, riches, etc. at the top of the mountain. We don’t see what Lincoln, MLK, Gandhi, Rosa Parks, Anne Frank…did when they set out to climb their mountain.

Today there have been many people who have reached the summit of their mountain only to be enveloped in a cloud that prevents them from seeing “the promised land.”  Instead of having increased vision, they settle for the fame or notoriety that came from scaling the mountain.

I applaud all those noble mountain climbers who are selfless trekkers. I salute those who did see a promised land.

However, I need to add that our lives are not diminished if we are not mountain climbers.  We need to take pride in our journey on the YBR because along the way we will learn to think more clearly, love more dearly, and have the courage of our convictions.

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Having expectations on the YBR. Are you crazy?

Expectation is the root of all heartache – Wm. Shakespeare.

A young kid is brought into a room that is waist high in manure.  The kid doesn’t hesitate to dive in…wildly with great expectations.  When asked what the hell he was doing, the kid replied, “With all this shit there has to be a pony somewhere.”

Even though I’m no longer a kid, I’m still covered with shit because I still believe that I’m going to find that elusive pony.

Now into my 17th year as an adjunct at my alma mater, I am late to the dance because it wasn’t until very recently that I learned that having expectations is living on the edge of a very slippery slope.  One of the quotes on expectations goes like this: when you have expectations, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

Holy shit!  What the hell have I been doing for 17 years?  I start off each semester with great expectations on the good ship called Learning. Somewhere along the journey I begin to see ice bergs looming ahead.  I look over at the side of the vessel and see that the real name of the ship is the Titanic.

I have a confession to make.  I am not cut from the same cloth as your typical college professor.  I am not an academic. I am a seeker. I have been seeking to find and put meaning into my life…all my life…because I believe a life without meaning is not a life at all.

While I might not have prospered in the financial sense of the word, I have prospered abundantly in so many other ways.  I can say this because I am so very curious.  My curiosity is the sail that catches the winds of destiny. My curiosity is what keeps the eternal 10-year old in me alive.

In class I don’t have the expectations expected in a college classroom.  Attendance?  You come to class because you want to come to class. Participation?  There has to be a burning desire inside you.  Grades?  In a flash you’ll forget all about your grades and how much you really didn’t deserve that A.

If it isn’t too late in my teaching career, I need to change one thing.  I have to replace the word “expectation” with the word “hope.”  You might be setting yourself up for disappointment if you have expectations, but hope keeps you floating.  I don’t believe you can ever be disappointed if you have hope.

With that said, I “hope” that my students will realize before they are too old to enjoy life and come to realize that what matters most is not your job title, what kind of car you drive, where you live, or how much money you have…what matters can be found in the lyrics of a simple song:

If you reach for the stars all you get are the stars
but if you reach for the heavens
 you get the stars thrown in
Anything can happen if you let it. Life is out there waiting
so go and get it. Grab it by the collar. Seize it by the scruff.
Once you’ve started living life you just can’t get enough
Sally forth and the obstacles start disappearing.
Go and chase your dreams. You won’t regret it
Anything can happen if you have hope in your heart.

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Commencement 2019 on the YBR. Today is your gift. Tomorrow is your responsibility.

It is fitting that I was asked to address the class of 2019 of Emerald City University because this year mark the 80th anniversary of the film that turned me from a beloved character in a charming book to an icon.

80 years ago President Franklin Roosevelt gave us a new deal and the maniacal Fuhrer Adolph Hitler gave us a raw deal. It was not the best of times for anybody and it was soon to become the worst of times for the millions of young men and women who gave their lives to save the world.

Today the world is different. Or is it? There is no depression, but millions of people the world over are living in abject poverty. Adolph Hitler might be dead, but he has been replaced by dozens of madmen who rule the world.

The world you are about to inherit continues to be a work in progress. The world you are about to enter does not need spectators who criticize from the sidelines. The world needs people who are willing to role up their sleeves to make the world a better place for all, not just a select few.

You have been called the entitled generation. Everything has been done for you. We’ve cut your meat, combed your hair, pushed you to the head of the line, and done everything to protect you from harm and hardships. But have we prepared you to take your first step on the Yellow Brick Road?

As a child my world was grey and I was at risk of turning as grey as my environment. I wanted more because I knew there was more. I also knew that I had to take ownership of the world I wanted. It wasn’t enough to dream about a world over the rainbow because dreaming without action does not change anything.

You might have earned a degree but you have not earned the right to think the world owes you the good life. The world does not owe you anything, but you owe the world everything.

At this moment in time all you can think about is your career.  You spent four years preparing for your future.  Nothing is going to get in your way.

Over 400 years ago Michelangelo said, “The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.”

Don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with having career aspirations. But there is something very wrong if our aspirations don’t inspire us to achieve greatness, and by greatness I mean by being a person filled with love, compassion, concern and a willingness to make personal sacrifices for others.

In mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. In life there is no shortest distance between any two points. Take it from me there are pot holes on the Yellow Brick Road and there might be some detours you have to take on your life’s journey.

As you begin your journey, keep this in mind, it is your journey. As hard as it may be not to follow in someone else’s footsteps, resist the temptation. Become your own person. Don’t take ownership of other people’s opinions. Don’t become a slave to any particular political point-of-view. Have the confidence to stand up for what you believe in. That means you have to have intelligence, a heart, and most of all courage.

In the end there are only two really important things. To love and to be loved. All else doesn’t matter.

I would like to end with a song. And not the song that you all associate with me, but a song that I believe should help you along on your journey because if you love and are open to being loved, you will never walk alone on the Yellow Brick Road.

Your graduation song

 

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Hope is a slippery little devil on the YBR.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way.”  – Charles Dickens A Tale of Two Cities

Those words could easily be the opening lines of an editorial in any newspaper in any city or town in America. Who could argue that today is the best of times. Who could deny that that today is the worst of times.

When Dickens penned the opening of his classic novel in 1859 he was talking about an earlier time when in 1789 the poor of France stormed the Bastille and ignited a revolution that paid homage to our revolution of 1776.

It really shouldn’t matter that there have always been times like today in the past.  In fact we should be inspired to see if we can change the course of history so the people of the future can’t say that we failed to do anything.

Mass shootings, school shootings, terrorists at every corner and a people who are divided by ideologies…political, religious and otherwise.  It’s almost to the point where we can no longer say that this is the best of times.

It is far too easy to blame it all on Donald Trump.  It’s just as foolish to point a finger at the Hilary supporters and say they are sad losers.

I think we are all to blame.  While some of us thought we were on the Yellow Brick Road heading to the Emerald City, we lost our way.  We are in the deep dark forest of despair. Some of us who don’t participate in mass rallies to support political characters are saddened by our current predicament.

The Scarecrow had no brains, but he was far smarter than all of us. We are the stuffed ones filled with straw.  We only hear what we want to hear. We only believe what we’ve been told to believe.  The left hates the right. The right hates the left.  The left makes a fist and challenges the right to a fight. The right makes a fist and offers a similar challenge to the left.

How much better off if the left hand and the right hand were to work together.

The Tin Man had no heart, but he was far more compassionate and understanding than all of us. But that does not mean that understanding is indiscriminate. A loving heart is balanced. A loving heart knows that the hungry fox should not be given the key to the chicken coop. A loving heart understands that “no” is not a bad word.

The Cowardly Lion might have lacked courage, but he had far more courage than we do. He knew the difference between right and wrong. As a citizen he would have castigated ALL our politicians. He would have called them out for being self-serving sycophants.  He would have pulled the curtain away from them and showed the world that not one of them was a wizard.

Trump’s rhetoric is hollow. His name calling is childish. In short he is a hollow man. But, his political opponents are as childish and hollow.  The venom that they spew is as equally dangerous as the putrid pronouncements from the White House.

Hatred is the entree of the day. Hatred is sapping our energy. Hatred is leaving us depleted of all hope.

When the vicious animals on the right and the rabid animals on the left realize their battle will destroy them both, they will turn on the rational people who still think, who still have heart, and who still have the courage to stand strong against the raging tide of the political tsunami that is threatening to drown us all.

 

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.
 – Robert Fulghum

A soundtrack for hope

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